PSYCHOBABBLE FROM THE MIND OF THE WORMTOWN MINISTER OF CULTURE ON THE SIXTH ANNIVERSARY OF WORMTOWN.ORG'S EXISTENCE ON EARTH

Why does this thing called Wormtown.org continue to exist?

Perhaps because the Wormtown Minister of Culture steadfastly refuses to participate in anything having to do with Rotisserie Baseball even though he lives for the baseball season. Like most males, he’s got to obsess over something, and since the fine art of trying to hear as many stations from around the world as possible on shortwave radio is no longer a major sport (much like hockey, unfortunately), he simply replaced that obsession with compiling listings. Once upon a time he did it for the Worcester Phoenix and having started, has never been able to stop. Hopefully you’ve used the Wormtown.org listings to find out if your favorite band was playing, see what was going on in the clubs and, if you’re a musician, took advantage of all the footwork to get yourself some gigs.

Is this so-called Wormtown Minster of Culture an actual real person?

Perhaps you should think of him as a modern-day John Forsythe – AKA Charlie of Charlie’s Angels who didn’t get a moment of face time on the popular ‘70s TV show but that didn’t stop it from being one of the highest rated programs. True, at this point, the ratings for Wormtown.org are slightly south of Katie Couric’s on CBS without the $60 million dollar contract (heck, at this point, a $60 one would be nice!) but a desire to helping people find music they’d enjoy is still a mission of those of us at Wormtown.org.

Who elected him?

No one. It was taken as a name for use as host of a radio program on WCUW around the time the Clash released their Combat Rock album; do a Google or Yahoo! Search for MC5 Minister of Culture and you’ll see the origin of the name. Of course, they took it from the Black Panthers. But he didn’t know it at the time. Joe Strummer might have used it too. Someone demanded an election a few years back; thankfully Mr. Putin took care of them by sending General Krutov to the US to set them straight.

Why does it seem that sometimes the content on Wormtown.org doesn’t change for weeks on end?

Maybe because it doesn’t. That’s not entirely true. The listings always change on a weekly basis, usually early Sunday morning before any of you wake up. That’s because the WMOC usually falls asleep between 8:45 and 9:30 p.m. if he hasn’t spent the whole day procrastinating and instead worked at one or all of his five writing gigs, put in his normal three miles of walking or biking or overturned the soil in his back yard with hope of finding some of the toys he buried there as a child. Hopefully you’ve found things to read in the Wormtown.org news section or bulletin board on a weekly basis. Beginning this week, you’re guaranteed to find something new almost every day of the work week in our news section with the introduction of our new “Introduce Yourself” feature which will try to bring new acts to your attention – maybe even encourage you to give them an opening slot at one of your gigs if you’ve got that option – as well as catch up with old favorites who are brand new to the dozens of new bands who seem to be springing up on a weekly basis.

(For all you newcomers) Why is it called Wormtown?

You better hope there’s worms in this town because it doesn’t seem the wrecking ball’s showing up to take down the old Worcester Common Outlet Mall and Galleria anytime soon; worms are cheaper, do a better job of breaking down material and allow it to be reused more easily and are a sign that everything you need for a fresh start is firmly in place. Of course, that’s coming from someone who depends on his garden for most of his warm weather season food. Wormtown Mayor L.B. Worm’s got his own reasons for having called it Wormtown and we suspect you’ll be reading all about it as the town that refuses to die nears its 30th anniversary next May.

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If you're one of those people hiding long-nurtured writing skills and need a place to share your opinions, we welcome your contributions to Wormtown.org. While we're primarily a music site (and, when we can get the material, an arts and culture enterprise as well), our main goal is to serve as an outlet for people's creativity, be it through concert reviews, photographs, interviews with your favorite bands or writers, or art work. We can't pay you - what we can offer you is an outlet for your work, which will remain in our archives for you to bookmark and send to prospective paying gigs. If interested, contact Brian Goslow at bgoslow@yahoo.com or submit a story.